Farewell!

And the year is gone… almost… time to say goodbye…

To those people we are not going to see anymore. We say goodbye by remembering their legacy and keeping the good memories.

To those people who changed so much… We say goodbye to their old ways by embracing and accepting their new form of being.

To those objects and places, things and circumstances that won’t be part of our lives anymore. We say goodbye by showing gratitude for every experience.

To the old normality… We say goodbye to so many ways we used to have to relate to each other, work, commute and many other big and little things we used to live, by being open to the new normality and adapt as much as possible.

To the old self, as we have changed so much! We say goodbye to the skills we are not going to use again, the habits we can’t use anymore and so many other factors that used to define the "I", by making effort and invest time in the new self that is just being born.

Farewell old year, people, things and normality! Farewell old self!

A tale with a mask

He arrived at his office – no holydays this year, what a shame!

It was still early and exactly as he wanted; without wasting time, he went on distributing his package – a brown pack like the one you get on a bakery contained a series of objects he started to put on his co-workers’ desks.

When they arrived, that was the first thing they saw: a shining brilliant mask, a black and white mask, a yellow, green or blue mask. Masks were everywhere!

Nobody was happy with having to work so close to Christmas; the only good thing was the absence of clients (the company would be so good without those people!).

Without thinking, any order or even a suggestion, everybody started to wear masks and related to each other behind them.

When the boss arrived – another victim of his company’s policy of working on Christmas’ eve – he also had a mask over his desk; after a minute or two of vacillation, he decided to wear it too. For that, people went crazy!

They were producing and working whatever they have to do one day before a wonderful holiday, but the mask had an unexpected effect… You see, John and Mary were not talking for more than a month, and now they found them drinking coffee together.

Peter and Paul on the other hand used to be as close as friends; with the masks on they were avoiding each other; and so on, many people displayed very strange behavior and around midday, when their shift would be over and they could go home, there was a strange tension in the air.

Just before everybody left – and everyone was kind of I want to escape from here – Andrew, a very quiet guy, step forward and asked for attention.

“Hi everyone! I hoped you enjoyed the masks… I brought to you as my Christmas gift, but also, I wanted to see what happened when you are wearing it. I am sure you realized much of the dynamic among us changed. So, let me just suggest one simple thing: take the mask off, everyone at the same time, 3, 2, 1…”

Slowly, each one took off the mask and started to look around. There was a wave of realization in relation to the real person behind the mask… and gradually a smile emerged in each face. And laughter started to sound.

After a while, Andrew took over to speak again.

“I would like you to think of this small experiment when you go back today to your family, friends or wherever you go, because many times we are wearing this invisible mask that covers our real feelings and intentions. We want to express them, but the mask does not allow it. And I would like to suggest you to remove your invisible mask” – and he did a funny gesture, as if he was still wearing a mask – “and look into the eyes of each person you see around you, at your home and other places. Look inside and see the real person there.”

He stopped a bit, he looked embarrassed, but nobody said anything, some people even have tears in their eyes.

“A wonderful Merry Christmas to each one!”

Caring, still caring…

And December has come!

The pandemic has caught us off guard and is still around, making a mess with the economy and the society we know, but a good value implemented during these hard times was TO CARE.

Of course, first we have to care of our own health by wearing masks or washing hands several times, by being alert in relation to signs that may indicate some sickness. But that makes us to care about others also, after all if that person would get sick, it would affect us too.

We have learnt to be careful and to leave aside the general carelessness we have been living.

But to care is much more than that…

• It means to care in terms of raising awareness, which has been one of the biggest challenges during this crisis. We have had to change our own perspective of the world, our old habits and the way to interact with each other.
• To care means we care about each other and we have generated initiatives to help each other during these hard times. Although many tragedies have taken place, it is heart-warming to see the dedication of people to improve others’ lives.
• To care is to be careful with signs of depression or anxiety. Mental health is also in a peak and if we really want to be happy and to be in harmony with others, we must be more alert to those signs.

So keep on caring!

What is wrong with today’s leadership?

I don’t want to justify the failure in the world’s leadership – and yes, it is a failure, there is no other world that may explain what is happening. However, there is a simple reason that explains it: lack of adaptation.

You see, leaders are masters in dealing with uncertainty, particular the one created by a crisis.

Most of them are also good in overcoming the obstacles that are fruit of a disruption.

So with both paradigms, the leaders can adapt and conquer.

However, very few leaders are ready to deal with uncertainty and disruption at the same time. It is kind of someone who is an expert in surviving an earthquake being affected by it plus a 10-meters wave…

This is why many leaders have chosen to attack the threat that was more visible, but have ignored others…

How to adapt to the convergence of these two paradigms? The best way would be to invest time and energy strengthening the leadership over the self.

At the extent our leaders become self-leaders, it will be easier for them to find certainty within and on the basis of that, they will be able to meet the problems that emerge with the disruption. Adaptation would happen from inside the self, from their thinking and decision-making process, instead of coming as a reaction.

In this way, we can create a better leadership for our civilization.

A session of coaching, just for you – part II

This has been a very interesting year and so, this session of coaching, distributed in two different posts, has an aim of helping you find meaning in the past year. This is the second part.

 

First of all, look for a place where you feel secure, safe. Along with that, do this at a time when you are not needed by others.

Please, don’t look at this as just a series of questions or tasks. Take them step by step, and take your time…

Take paper and pen, or pencil. If you want you can take a watch to keep time, but try not. And yes, be unplugged for the time of the exercise.

Let’s begin…

 

Session 3: if we think of 2020 as a school…

What were the best lessons you have learnt?

• How would they be useful for you for the next year?

What were the most difficult lesson to learn and why?

• How could you improve your capacity of learning, so lessons like those can be assimilated?

 

Session 4: if we think of 2020 as a training course…

What was the best thing that happened to you?

• In the future, what will be the use of that as a lesson?

What were the lessons you feel you haven’t learnt well?

• How can you give yourself another chance to learn them?

A session of coaching, just for you – part I

This has been a very interesting year and so, this session of coaching, distributed in two different posts, has an aim of helping you find meaning in the past year.

 

First of all, look for a place where you feel secure, safe. Along with that, do this at a time when you are not needed by others.

Please, don’t look at this as just a series of questions or tasks. Take them step by step, and take your time…

Take paper and pen, or pencil. If you want you can take a watch to keep time, but try not. And yes, be unplugged for the time of the exercise.

Let’s begin…

 

Session 1: it is better if you do all of this first, in order and during a certain time limit.

How do you feel in relation to this year? Write as much as possible.

Which things, scenes of your life or aspects of your environment you would prefer they would be rather different?

How much was your life impacted by all that happened this year?

Now, think you are being interviewed in 2025 about the year 2020. Indicate a few things you would tell your audience.

 

Session 2: do this after the first session; as you can see, there are two main questions, you can change the order if you want.

During this year you or another person has made an error that impacted your life. Which error was it?

By correcting that error, what would happen to the rest of your year?

By not correcting that error, what did REALLY happen (to the rest of your year)?

Something right happened that touched your heart or created a positive impact in your life; it may be the right thing you or another person did. Which right thing was it?

What was the impact of that right thing in the rest of your year?

If that right thing hasn’t happened, what would happen to the rest of your year?

 

Next week we will continue…

The present is a present hard to hold

Present is… fast… you just think of something that is taking place right now and it is over!

So, what to do?

Well, we often prefer to think of the past and dwell in past wonderful experiences, or relive regrets.

Or we keep on thinking of the future we want or we expect.

But, what about the present? Let’s reframe it!

In our present, we are living the fruit that have come from seeds sown in the past.

In our present, we are sowing the seeds for the fruit we will be reaping in the future.

Do we realize how important is the present??

Let’s plan it better…

Every thought is a seed for all that will happen in the future and they have come from a past that is so valuable.

Every word is a full of seeds that they will inspire so many and they will generate a very powerful environment. Every word brings up the best of mine, cultivated along the years.

Every action I do is a seed for someone else to change their lives, besides it turns into a brick of the house I will live in the future.

It is a present we should treasure at every moment.