To let go of control, self-control is the solution

Control feels like safety. When you are in control of your job, your family, your life or anything really, it is like you can do whatever you want.

So, letting go of control sounds almost irresponsible as it gives structure, predictability and the comforting illusion that, if we manage everything carefully enough, nothing will fall apart. And yet, life has a subtle way of reminding us that control, when taken too far, becomes tension.

Much of the pressure does not come from what happens, but from the constant effort to make things happen our way: to control outcomes, people, timing, emotions - even ourselves. This kind of control narrows our perception of life and it demands constant vigilance, leaving little room for luck or fate.

Letting go of control does not mean giving up. It does not mean passivity, indifference or lack of responsibility. It means recognizing the limits of external control and shifting attention inward.

This is the point when self-control quietly enters as the real solution.

Self-control is not about suppression or rigidity as many would think. It is the ability to choose a response instead of reacting automatically. It is the strength to pause, to observe what is happening inside and to act from clarity rather than impulse. When self-control is present, there is no need to control others or circumstances.

Ironically, the more self-control grows, the less external control is required and that takes us to a situation in which emotions are acknowledged before being unleashed, saving many relationships in the process. Self-control helps us to face situations without the hunger to dominate them.

Letting go of control, then, is not a loss of power, but its refinement. Power moves from the outside to the inside, from force to awareness, from fear to steadiness, from shouting to a deep resilience.

Next time you feel being in control is making you stressed, just go deeply within, meditate, contemplate or just reflect for a few moments. Feel the control you have on yourself. Let go of the control in the world.

And then, act.

Emotional Burnout…

Sometimes emotions run wild. Often, they are a way of processing reality by throwing outward whatever is inside us - thoughts, feelings, perceptions, worries.

This emotional outpouring usually leads to three possible outcomes:

• A sense of relief, accompanied by understanding or compassion from others.
• A sense of powerlessness, along with indifference - or even opposition - from others.
• A feeling of being completely drained and exhausted, regardless of how others respond.

The first outcome suggests that emotions were expressed in a healthy way. These are constructive emotions, as they contribute to personal well-being and collective harmony.

The second outcome is linked to destructive emotions. They are toxic, create a negative atmosphere and tend to damage relationships.

But what concerns me mostly is the third outcome - when emotions burn a person from the inside.

As a way of processing reality, if this capacity of expressing emotions becomes exhausted or “burnt,” other less healthy mechanisms often take over - such as addictions or compulsive behaviors.

At that point, the person may feel overpowered and defeated. There seems to be no way out, at least on the surface.

To prevent emotional burnout, some helpful approaches include:

• Finding healthy ways to release emotions, such as sports or group therapy.
• Practicing meditation with a proper methodology that fosters emotional regulation, such as mindfulness.
• Making lifestyle changes; sometimes even a simple shift in diet can have a noticeable impact.
• If burnout is approaching - or already present - taking some distance from the source of stress, for example by travelling, may help in the short term.

And finally, there is nothing more calming than speaking with someone who truly listens.

Just do it, it is very important for you and for others.

A Hero’s Journey to Becoming a Diamond

 

You are the hero of your own life – always! Yet, at certain moments, we go beyond our personal needs and act selflessly for others. Then from hero we become a hira.

This is the story of a wealthy jeweler who chose exactly that path. Instead of living a comfortable retirement or a religious one, as was common in old India, Brahma Baba took up the mantle of being his own hero.

All of us play the role of hero in our lives, but not everyone realizes it. A hero navigates life boldly, discovering new inner lands, helping others with courage and shaping reality instead of waiting for it to change.

Brahma Baba was one of the few who recognized this. He founded an organization that today serves millions around the world. Rather than waiting for transformation in a harsh world, he planted a seed - and watched a garden grow.

He faced obstacles, even from those he wished to help. It was then the coal - the ordinary human striving to do good - underwent the final fire of transformation and became a hira, a shining diamond.

We too carry that potential within us. We can be our own heroes and, at times, heroes for others. But very few shine like Brahma - a hero for others, an angel for millions.

 

Today, I invite you to be your own hero.
Today, I invite you to begin becoming a hira.

Effects of a modern life: burnout

 

We live in a very modern world with so many facilities. Life in general is easier than 50 years ago… And so, why do we get stressed?

Some time ago, stress was the main enemy in the workplace and for society in general. In fact, many years ago, when I had to… eh… miss my job for one day, I went to a doctor who, without any real exam, gave me a note saying I was with stress… Yes, that was part of life and my boss accepted it without any argument.

Then, it seemed stress became a thing of the past or part of our normal, not sure which. People stopped talking about it and you wouldn’t see doctors referring to that anymore; instead, the new culprit was loneliness and social media.

My guess is that hyperconnectivity gave people a sensation stress was not a big thing by opening the door for multiple relaxation possibilities. After all, who can be stressed after watching a lovely video of a dog playing in the snow?

Present time: for some time now, stress is back to the headlines with many articles touching its extreme form: the burnout. It is that horrible sensation in which you are “burning”, or else your brain is getting hammered hardly. A person in that stage, and I have seen a few, cannot work properly or live a normal life.

In its extreme, burnout may even be lethal and its normalization will make people less aware and will not look for a solution. I hope this does not normalize or be forgotten… but the trend has been visible for years, it is destined...

What can we do to prevent burnout?

• Meditate a lot.
• Make space to process your emotions.
• Avoid shortcuts like addictions or constant distraction.
• Exercise and a good diet.
• Reduce unnecessary pressure.
• Limit time with people who drain or push you.
• Consider whether your work aligns with your wellbeing.
• Seek professional support when needed.
• Do things that nourish your happiness.
• Donate, be a volunteer, make other people happy, as giving heals.

And when the flags are all red and the signals are visible (burnout!), don’t wait. Look for medical help; your grandmother’s herb tea won’t work then…

I think we have all experienced stress and I don’t feel anybody is really free from burnout. Please, let’s not allow this to normalize or been forgotten. It is a reality and we must deal with it.

How can you like what is unlikeable?

 

I remember many years ago, someone cooked a sweet dish that I really didn’t like. In fact, it was horrible for my taste - and for a friend’s too. As he used to work in a food company, he immediately knew what to do: lots of chocolate over it! At last, we could eat it.
Many aspects of our lives seem to require lots of chocolate just to be livable.

Because the tendency is this: when we face something we don’t like, someone who doesn’t agree with us, or situations that are clearly not working as they “should”, we instinctively think that should change. The other person. The circumstances. Reality itself.

And yet, very often, that wish is unrealistic.

The reality is rather uncomfortable: we truly have control over just one thing in the whole universe - ourselves. And even that comes with effort, strength and a good dose of humility.

From an Eastern perspective, something quite radical is suggested: instead of fighting life, we endeavor to embrace it as it is. Not as resignation, but as clarity that is born from resilience. Seeing things clearly, without denial and an unnecessary drama.

If possible, of course, change the ingredients, adding a bit more of “chocolate” in whatever you are living. If needed, prepare for the future, taking some chocolate with you, just in case.

And always, cultivate flexibility - internally and externally - so that agreements, adjustments and new perspectives can emerge.

Sometimes there is no chocolate to pour on top. Sometimes the dish stays bitter. But the invitation from life is not to like everything, but to stop rejecting it so fiercely. To notice what is happening inside us. To soften. To learn. To grow.

Maybe liking the unlikeable is not about changing the taste of life, but about changing the way we meet it.

The New Year was knocking at her door...

 

“New... What is new, really?”

Her body was getting older and older. The same was true of her house, her shoes, her cell phone, and everything she owned.

The same for her relatives, neighbors, and everyone she knew.

Because everything and everyone felt old, new things no longer touched her heart or her mind. Not even the New Year... just something people fabricated.

For the past ten years, it had been the same - some kind of rejection. She had even thought of covering all the mirrors in her apartment so she would not have to see her ugly, old face. Of course, there were no calendars in the house either...

One day, as she was preparing herself to do a few tasks, the doorbell rang. Strange... for some time now, she had not received a visitor who hadn’t called beforehand.

“Who is there?”

No response.

Well, the easy solution was to avoid it, so she simply didn’t open the door.

As the New Year drew closer, she noticed that the knocking at her door was becoming more persistent, more frequent. She thought of calling the police - but what for?

Right at midnight... almost midnight... on the last day of the year, the knocking on the door came again - this time very forcefully. It sounded as if it were about to break down the door.

Scared, but determined not to lose her door, she went and opened it.

And there it was: a little girl, smiling sweetly at her.

“Hello!”

Well, after so much “drama,” a simple “hello” wouldn’t do.

“You have been knocking at my door all these days! What do you want, young lady?”

“Well, I had to, don’t you see? I am the New Year...”

A crazy girl...

“Come with me.” She extended her small, gentle hands toward the old lady. “Come to the New Year.”

She was really scared now.

“I know you are scared, and that is not my intention. But if anyone in the world refuses to enter the New Year, then it is my job to come and take them. That is why I am here.”

She moved her hand closer to the old lady...

“Listen, it will be beautiful - I know that... and terrifying too!” She giggled a little. “However, it is already like that for you, right? So the New Year will be just a change of a number. By accepting it in your heart, at least it will be accompanied by some hope.”

This time, the old woman listened more attentively. She saw that it was useless to resist, and at last she gave her hand to the little girl.

It felt like a whirlpool, and for a few moments she felt elated - so happy, like never before.

And then it was over.

The door was in its original position. There was no sign of the little girl.

After some time, she sat down and decided to celebrate quietly.

The New Year.

The end of the old year.

The beginning of hope.

Newness for an old tradition

 

The robot looks strangely at the object he had just assembled at the entrance of the beautiful house.

His daily work is vast, but he does not complain; it is not in its programming... It simply does what it has to do in the best possible way, with the precision of an advanced science.

Everyone praises the quality of its food, both in nutrition and taste. Everyone is surprised by the cleanliness of the house, the clothes so well ironed, the dishes washed and everything else that a home entails.

At night, it sleeps like everyone else, recharging the battery. The next day, it goes back to work based on what it is told.

Even this strange object...

A Christmas tree.

For the robot, it's like anything else, but it's the first time that the inhabitants of that house showed so much interest by participating along with it in the task of the tree. And while the robot watches, people keep placing packages under it. Why?

Using the fantastic artificial intelligence that distinguishes it, in a quick search, it shows that they are Christmas gifts, a way to exchange love... Ten months ago, when it went to serve this house, that word came up in the middle of many conversations, overheard by the robot, who could never understand it well.

The next day, after a lot of work, much more than usual, the robot prepares to go to sleep when its master calls it. He is happy, more than usual, he takes one of the packages under the tree and hands it to the robot. On a sign, the robot's internal system is able to discern a word: JUANCITO.

Consciously, the robot knows that this is its code for these people, how to recognize that they require something from it. After a few microseconds of processing, the robot manages to interpret what was happening.

This package has his name on it.

This package is therefore his.

According to what he researched, it is a sign of love...

For another microsecond, he feels something... As if something internally had changed.

Delicately, according to his programming, he takes the package and thanks.

He takes it to the station where he lives, right next to the washing machine, and as he prepares to recharge overnight, he opens the package, as delicately as he had taken it.

Searching the networks, he finds that he had been given a hat, something quite useless, not practical for his day to day. Still, without knowing why, he puts it on his head and goes to sleep...

For the next few days and months, the robot would wear his hat without fail. Questioned by the company about their performance, the owners of the house could not be happier with his services.

For years, no one would be able to explain the old-fashioned robot that continued to serve a certain family, and his strange hat, complemented by a scarf, a Hawaiian shirt - on which he placed a tie - and all sorts of other elements...

Nor would they be able to explain the number of electronic elements that the members of that house carried, all with a little word written – and hidden, as they had to find it: JUANCITO.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!