How heavy is your present?

Have you ever received a very heavy gift from another person? You would often enjoy, but many times you will feel annoyed while you would try to carry that around. It is possible would get broken.

What about your present (tense)? Is it light and shiny, or heavy and dull?

The situations are what they are, but our perception changes their weight. For instance a person can tell you how the weather is bad and another person would call it wonderful, even though the weather is the same for both of them.

By looking at the weather in a bad way, the person will experience negative emotions and it is possible that affects their health. Also, because the weather is bad, their social life will be affected and possibly even their job.

By looking at the (same) weather in a positive way, the person will experience constructive emotions, which maybe will affect (positively) their health. Perhaps because the weather looks good, their social life and their career will blossom too.

Now, there is a realistic optimism in which the person acknowledges the weather is bad, but that is not an obstacle for their health, social or work life. In fact, it becomes an interesting challenge and the individual has a chance to celebrate after overcoming it.

If you are feeling your present as a heavy burden, about to break the soul’s back, a few suggestions:

• Talk with someone who is more optimistic in relation to the present, but very realistic about it.
• Count your blessings; there are so many things for which you can be proud, happy or excited.
• Try to talk to yourself, reflect and understand why you are feeling like this in relation to the present.
• Meditation helps you to focus on the present and take maximum benefit.

And remember: your present is a gift life has given you.

How heavy is your present?

Have you ever received a very heavy gift from another person? You would often enjoy, but many times you will feel annoyed while you would try to carry that around. It is possible would get broken.

What about your present (tense)? Is it light and shiny, or heavy and dull?

The situations are what they are, but our perception changes their weight. For instance a person can tell you how the weather is bad and another person would call it wonderful, even though the weather is the same for both of them.

By looking at the weather in a bad way, the person will experience negative emotions and it is possible that affects their health. Also, because the weather is bad, their social life will be affected and possibly even their job.

By looking at the (same) weather in a positive way, the person will experience constructive emotions, which maybe will affect (positively) their health. Perhaps because the weather looks good, their social life and their career will blossom too.

Now, there is a realistic optimism in which the person acknowledges the weather is bad, but that is not an obstacle for their health, social or work life. In fact, it becomes an interesting challenge and the individual has a chance to celebrate after overcoming it.

If you are feeling your present as a heavy burden, about to break the soul’s back, a few suggestions:

• Talk with someone who is more optimistic in relation to the present, but very realistic about it.
• Count your blessings; there are so many things for which you can be proud, happy or excited.
• Try to talk to yourself, reflect and understand why you are feeling like this in relation to the present.
• Meditation helps you to focus on the present and take maximum benefit.
• Remember: your present is a gift life has given you.

Building castles in future lands

What is the antonym of nostalgia, a longing for the past? As far as I know, there is no such a word, but unfortunately, it exists in terms of behavior.

I remember a few people who wanted to go to a special program in United States and they didn’t have the visa. Particularly one person who just went to order her passport called me asking for the weather at the place she was going in the US… (to which she didn’t have ticket, visa and not even the passport!)

An image I have in my mind: there are people who build castles in lands that don’t even exist, and they start to live there. As it may happen with nostalgia, they are probably frustrated with the their present and so the possibility of a future that is different than the present they are living makes them leave this place… without really leaving it, just an experience in her mind.

It is quite risky; after all, they have to work, take care of their children, their own health, to talk with friends and do all a person who must do in our society. People who live in these future castles sometimes are careless in relation to their present hut.

There is an even worse frustration as sometimes it happens that their imagined future is not what they were expecting. It may be totally different – a manor instead of a castle – or a maybe unexpected experience – can you imagine to CLEAN a whole castle??

If you really want to live in a castle one day, start with one brick today, another tomorrow… The future does not take place in our imagination but it will be the fruit of whatever we are sowing right now.

Do you live in the past?

Is it a fashion or the desire to listen to old music is growing more than it was expected? Just browse around internet and you will see it is a reality.

With the pandemic, nostalgia is in and not only in terms of music; many people can´t stop thinking of the old times of 50, 30 or even 5 years ago! By the way, I am listening to some wonderful songs of the past right now…

You know, if you really like those things of the past, why not? There is nothing bad about reliving some wonderful experience, memory or reinventing whatever you went through… as long as you don’t start living there.

Maybe you don’t like the present, but you do live NOW and when you try to live in the past, you are probably missing so many opportunities.

A deep reflection is that whatever I lived in the past that left such wonderful memory in my heart – and a song is playing, which used to be favorite of a person I won’t be able to see anymore, I haven’t even been able to say goodbye – I can still live now as memories of that wonderful person, her words and wisdom and her good wishes towards me flood my mind (not my eyes, not my eyes!).

Instead of going to the past, I bring the past to this time and live that beautiful energy in my life without delay; therefore it is like feeling her presence everywhere I go, because I am using those memories here. In this way, the past helps me to create an even better future in which I know she won’t be present, but part of my life will be her legacy.

The present is a present hard to hold

Present is… fast… you just think of something that is taking place right now and it is over!

So, what to do?

Well, we often prefer to think of the past and dwell in past wonderful experiences, or relive regrets.

Or we keep on thinking of the future we want or we expect.

But, what about the present? Let’s reframe it!

In our present, we are living the fruit that have come from seeds sown in the past.

In our present, we are sowing the seeds for the fruit we will be reaping in the future.

Do we realize how important is the present??

Let’s plan it better…

Every thought is a seed for all that will happen in the future and they have come from a past that is so valuable.

Every word is a full of seeds that they will inspire so many and they will generate a very powerful environment. Every word brings up the best of mine, cultivated along the years.

Every action I do is a seed for someone else to change their lives, besides it turns into a brick of the house I will live in the future.

It is a present we should treasure at every moment.

Is there any future in my horizon?

Images can be inspiring… A picture I have taken shown a foggy road and although you could see the beginning and a few meters further, nothing was waiting for you ahead.

At these times, that is future for us.

For some unknown reason, humanity has been obsessed in learning about their future; so many things were created for that. And then the uncertainty paradigm has become predominant, so there is no horoscope that can really tell you the future now, and no consultant or coach can really guide you in these very foggy times.

You are on your own…

But…

There is another wonderful possibility: you can create your own future. Step by step, action by action, thought by thought. That is, you are your own leader.

Taking into account that, here are a few suggestions:

• To be in uncertain times does not mean to not plan your future. Just be deeper and think in terms of a future vision instead of only objectives & aims.
• Be prepared to adapt, but don’t lose focus or important things related to life such as values and relationship.
• Make your present a real present for yourself and the people who live and work with you. Whatever you do now, its fruits will become your future at some point.
• Develop your resilience in such a way that you will face obstacles from a high energy.
• When you fail for some reason, just turn the failure into a step towards your success. Learn, change and implement the lessons onto your life.

Dreaming is the most important thing – Reason 63

The present can be uncertain, the past is sometimes foggy and the future is completely unknown, but dreams have the effect of helping us to live our lives.

Then, after a certain age or period of time, dreams just stop for most people.   Ironically it seems initially like a blessing, because the person starts to flow with life.  You probably know the feeling: eat whatever is there, do whatever the boss says, laugh when it is supposed to and, of course, cry at the right moment.

Leaders don’t fall into that trap, because they know the present moments may also be clearer if there are dreams or goals, in fact even the past takes on a different meaning.

(Excerpt from the book 82 Reasons to be a Leader)

 

Your past is a source of inspiration and values, but does not define your present actions - Reason 54

Past is merged in the present of all of us; for instance, look at the body and a person can even remember the type of food he used to eat that helped to shape it.

Past defines people, or to put it more accurately, many people allow their past to define their present state of existence. 

But, for a leader, past does not limit who she or he is, because leaders can change those traces that are not relevant to the moment.  After all, manage change and being an agent of change is part of being a leader.

Because of that, past becomes a point of reference from where a leader can take inspirations for improvement.  The past serves to show the leader lessons to be learnt, values to be kept and motivates him or her to make it better next time.

When past ceases to be a place for nostalgia, it turns into a source of teachings for life.

(Excerpt from the book 82 Reasons to be a Leader)

 

Fearing death or living forever

Some people think of life as the time they spend between being born and dying. Quite often they are the people who are always worried and complaining, criticizing and creating problem. Nothing is totally good for them and satisfaction is a word they don’t know much. The good side is that they don’t create much attachment to others, but lots of attachment to their own body and personality, their own way of living.

Other people think they will live forever and they dedicate themselves to have more and more. They don’t mind about the future as such, because… future? What future? All will be OK… A big advantage is that they are frequently in a good humored stage and they easily adapt themselves. But, of course, one day they get old and the fragility of human life knocks at their door.

An alternative thought?

Spirituality helps you to live the now, without forgetting the tomorrow and honoring the lessons of the past.

Although death is certain, spiritual people neither fear death nor avoid thinking about it. When it is time to go, a person knows he has to go, and that is ok; meanwhile, life is to be lived at its full extension, full of love, peace and happiness.

A spiritual person knows he will live forever, but not physically. A soul is thought as being immortal, but its container, the body, is perishable. To deal with this ambiguity, we can remind ourselves of that old quote: We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.

It is easy: live fully by connecting with the best of you and think of life as a big experience that will enrich you as a being.

Present, past and future

Practically speaking, we all live in the present and no matter how much we remember our past or plan and dream our future, we still live in the present moment. However, over and over we think of our past and future, and they clearly interfere in our present.

Good or bad, this creates some stress in people as they can't change their past and they can't really control their future completely. Probably, that's why in many meditation practices the person starts by focusing in the here and now.

It is healthy to learn how to deal with those subtle pressures we put on ourselves, after all we have many other real pressures to deal with...

• Your present is the key. The more satisfied, happy and peaceful you are, the less your past and future will affect your present life. So, make some effort to sort circumstances out and live a life you really want to live.
• Your past is, well, past... Anytime our past tries to creep into your life, remind yourself that is already past and it cannot change. Of course, if that past gives you some kind of positivism (as good memories do), it is OK, but don't let it unfocus of your present effort and life.
• Your future is not! It will be at some point, and nobody can really foresee that. Yes, you can plan, and it is good to have a vision, objective and aims in life, but with detachment in case they don't happen.
• Every day, live your day. At the beginning of the day and at its end, focus in the here and now. Experience the life you have, the thoughts you think and appreciate that effort.
• The present is a present for you. After all, your present contains a summary of your past and the seeds to your future. Focus on the present and you'll be honoring the past and generating a brilliant future.