Memory… is it nostalgic, or can it be a positive factor in our lives?

Nowadays if you browse for a while in your favorite platform, you will find songs from all times!

Nowadays, old movies are back!

Nowadays, we have a tendency to go into the memory lane more than ever…

Yes, nostalgy, saudade, that feeling you often can’t name or pinpoint, but you know it very well. They are emotions that enable you to travel through time and experience things of the past as if they are taking place now. Right now…

My question is: are those emotions or feelings good?

NO!

Yes…

It all depends. Memories can feed depression, conflicts and even a sense of powerlessness.

On the other hand, memories can be used is as an inner motivation, often coming from an understanding, which changes the present attitude.

Yes, you are in trouble now, but can you remember that time you were able to win in a similar situation?

OK, you are fighting (again) with your best friend, but do you remember how good that person is and how much joy you had together?

By focusing on those memories, you will feel courage or you will be able to fix your friendship.

In this case, they are not only positive, but encouraged. Many years ago, a very wise yogi teacher was giving a class, in which she shared about someone who was not so well at that moment. She suggested the person to remember the best memories and relive them in their minds.

The effect was immediate: the individual was transported to that moment, there was an experience of peace and happiness, calm in the mind and decisions could be taken. It is immediate…

So, my invitation is that instead of drowning in the memory of better times, use it as a leverage to change your attitude or behavior.

Never forget… or forever forget?

During life we go through so many experiences. Some are recorded deeply into the soul and we remember their images, sounds and sensations; they are also present in our habits, lifestyle, our way of thinking and communicating with others.

Other experiences, we forget so much that it is as if we have never had them: that wonderful food, this person who is talking, former co-workers…

Nothing bad about that, as it is normal, but the problem is when we remember what we should have forgotten and we forget what we should have remembered. What to do about it?

Let’s focus on the things we forget…

First of all, we shouldn’t feel bad if we have forgotten something*; there is always a reason for that. Maybe that scene is not relevant anymore in my life or at least, not at this moment; perhaps, I really didn’t see benefit in it. If someone is close to me, to us, they will accept that forgetfulness as normal and if it is necessary, they will remind us with kindness.

Now, if something was forgotten that was really important, a simple tip is to make it relevant again. For instance, I used to write poetry in my youth, but that was all forgotten; then, for some volunteer work, I had the challenge of reminding people of some duty and poetry, in a humorous way, has been used to do that – the person laughs at it, they like it and they do what they would be supposed to do!

Last, there is something we can control: what we are living right now. To remember or forgetting something, there are three questions we can ask ourselves:

• What am I learning?
• What is the experience I am living here that I want to treasure?
• Which of the experiences I am going through I will share with others?

This will help to keep something in memory, but also to release those things that are not useful or significant.

Of course, we have to do something to keep the memory: take pictures, write something, shoot the scenes… But the most important work has been done as that scene of our life has become more than just a passing cloud, turning into an important part of our life, something we will always remember…

* Sometimes, memory problems can be caused by physical reasons. If you forget things in a certain pattern, it is good to check with a doctor.

What to forget, what to remember

Forgetting and remembering are two sides of the same coin: consciousness.

I am not talking here of oblivion where memories are erased or blurred as if they were behind a fog.

Nor do I speak of the memory as the obsessive thought that does not allow us to erase something from the mind.

I speak of the conscious act of recovering valuable memories, since along with them, virtues, values ​​and inner powers will arise. These memories can be the solution to a problem present at work, a conflict with another person or they can give rise to hope in the face of a serious health situation.

I speak of the conscious act of reducing guilt, both of oneself and of others; forget so much that we stop blaming. I'm talking about the conscious act of forgetting bad times with a person because you understand them and you know that we all go through bad days. I speak of the conscious act of instead of allowing negative memories, to strengthen the present wonder.

For this, do this simple daily exercise:

Think: What will I remember today that will bring into my life qualities or powers that I need so much?

Think: What are the alternatives I have to relate to a person, so that I forget bad moments of past interactions?

That will help you improve your quality of life and will also give other people an opportunity to improve in your eyes.