Expressing yourself

I still remember when I used to take care of my little sister, who was a few months-old. I was a young man, studying in a military school and I went back home for vacation – taking care of your little sister was not part of my plan…

It was a very interesting time and one of my challenges was to understand what she wanted. Many times, she looked wiser than me – when she tried to sleep as early as 6 pm, so I could have at least a free night. Although she couldn’t speak and her emotions were very raw, her expression was clear enough.

Nowadays, the challenge is different of course, but it has some common elements with this example. As most of the communication a person have happens without seeing other people, via email or WhatsApp, the paradigm of expressing the self is changing very quickly.

Even letting aside the written language and the fact u is replacing you, I am expressing myself through the way I use the words, the way the ideas flow and transform themselves into a message, sent to millions, in many cases.

In fact, what is happening is that subtly, part of a person goes along with his message. Vibrations? Maybe… But that is something to take in account by leaders in the whole world. Two interesting examples of good expression using subtle aspects:

• Jill Bolte Taylor is an American scientist who described her own experience with a brain stroke in the book My stroke of Insight. At a point in her book, she described her mother’s effort in her recovery; after receiving many good wishes cards, her mother posted them in her apartment’s wall, on her way. Although Jill couldn’t see the cards or read them, she could feel the vibration of love coming from it.
• Antanas Mockus is a Colombian expert in pedagogy. Many of us still remember the cards he made up to teach people how to drive in a more conscious way. His new campaign is to help drivers to understand the laws of coexistence, in terms of traffic particularly in intersections. Through images and other tools, he hopes to help drivers to have a better experience, and create a better city.

Check your communication style for the subtle and invisible elements there. Maybe, they are the one that will boost your capacity of expression.

The art of speech (The 16 celestial arts)

When I was a child, due to circumstances in my life, I was brought up by my grandmother. She was a Spanish woman, living from the age of 9 in Brazil, but still her Portuguese was never good which affected the development of my own way of speaking. In Brazil, these things are very serious and discrimination is harsh if someone does not speak at least a standard Portuguese.

A friend of mine helped me to fill the gap and soon I was speaking like a prince! I would become a real fanatic by the language which should be called Brazilian, since our Portuguese is very different (and more beautiful) than the original...

But, life has its traps and here I am, far from my own original and beloved language, which I enjoy by listening to songs and talking a few hours a year. More irony: the profession I have chosen is one where speech is a must.

As a business consultant, coach or author, I need to know how to express myself coherently and powerfully. I need to convince people in the audience, or clarify important concepts for them.

I am not arrogant; I know I don't really master Spanish. In fact, I am used to say that I speak three languages... all of them badly!

But, the art of speech is not about how perfectly you are able to communicate. It is not about beautiful words and the way you use them. It is not a contest...

It is the art of expressing whatever is happening inside you. Isn't it a wonderful thing? We have a whole world happening inside, a gigantic quantity of feelings, emotions, thoughts, experiences being processed, past and future desires... The art of speech is that fine art when you are able to channel that inner treasure. Besides that, you are able to contribute something to your audience, enriching them with your experience.

A tip: don't get caught into the words. Let the soul expresses itself freely. It doesn't matter if you are going to give a talk on global economy, how to take care of dogs or something very intimate to a friend - in all these cases, soul's energy will make the message much more powerful as words won't be just words but they will be a piece of your world.