A life-long learning process

To have a dynamic life, full of energy and meaning, it is important to understand that this is the greatest university!

Every day, every moment, at every interaction or chance to contemplate, you and I are learning. There is no ending for that.

So, I would like to suggest you two things.

First, always be OPEN TO LEARN. This requires humility and self-esteem, kindness and courage, and most importantly, the deep desire to progress.

Second, always be OPEN TO SHARE. You will need to feel the pulse of the person with whom you are sharing, teaching, coaching or mentoring. You will have to go beyond knowledge and trust your own wisdom. And share with generosity, openness, mercy and love.

We are sharing the same classroom, let’s make the best of it.

 

Discovering that part of yourself that is hidden from others

Johari Window: exploring the hidden parts…

 

You have a secret!

Maybe the reason you have it is because you consider it so valuable, you don’t want to share, at least not to everyone and not until this moment; which is OK, after all, treasures are to be kept. They are an object of legend! Right?

I give you an alternative. Find the right moment (soon, please!) and show that talent you have, what you have been studying or the wonderful discovery you are not revealing to others.

In fact, the more you expose your treasures, the more you will develop them.

However, there are secrets you don’t tell others because of some type of fear. What are they going to tell me if they know this?

If you really want to develop a good relationship with other people, those secrets can turn into an obstacle. There are a few options for you:

• Find the RIGHT MOMENT, that instant people will value what you have. It is true particularly in relation to talents or skills.
• Generate a space of dialogue and talk to those people, open your heart. Before doing that, take some mercy balm in the form of a nice book with encouraging words or a song that will remind you how great you are. This is specially for those secrets that can harm a relationship.
• In both cases, I suggest you to meditate before doing any of those things. Meditation will empower you.
• If people hurt you because what you have shown or told them, don’t cry. The meditation will help you to not get into despair and something good you can do is to remind yourself THAT IS MY TREASURE. As they didn’t recognize its value, it is time to look for other people who will value it as much as you do.

There may be many more reasons for you to keep things hidden from others, but I would like to highlight two more:

• Self-doubt. Yes, you have that treasure, but you are not sure it is so interesting or others need it. The best thing for that is to talk with someone you trust and work on what to do about it.
• Maybe OTHERS haven’t acknowledged you have that treasure. Well, that hurts! You have already shown them, you have talked to them and you have posted it everywhere, but people seem to ignore it or at least they don’t give the value you think it should receive. Well, in that case, a talk with experts in the area of your treasure will clear your mind in relation to others’ reasons. After that, you can plan what to do to make others appreciate that wonderful treasure.

Is it easy to be superman or superwoman?

A song has touched my heart and it affirms, again and again it’s not easy… to be that hero others expect you to be.

This is reflected in many movies and episodes: being a hero is not an easy job. Supermen and superwomen are becoming out of fashion…

And yet, maybe this is the moment humanity needs more than ever a hero. Or two. Perhaps more than that…

Climate change, politics, social issues, economics… Wherever you look, the signs of distress of a society in decline are visible. As per history, our civilization is about to be destroyed.

So, we, ordinary people, look at the sky, looking for a savior, a hero or a heroine to prevent that destruction.

We need people who are able to do sacrifices, help others beyond their limits and use their superpowers to overcome obstacles.

Unfortunately, we can’t find them. Perhaps, all we need is another point of view: would YOU like to be the next SuperWoman or SuperMan?

Your superpower could be mercy, gentleness or the incredible ability of not contaminating the planet.

Your sacrifice may be the end of old harmful habits like prejudice, wasting food, consumerism and many others.

If you accept, at every heart of those you help, a statue will be erected in your honor, a statue made of love, blessings and good wishes.

Please, accept… I’ve offered myself already, it is worthwhile.

About love and compassion, mercy and understanding

Many times, while reading the news, the conclusion is that our world has turned into a very dry place…

So, would you try to use a bit of water of love? Just give other people something: a smile, a kind word or an object wrapped with good intentions.

Maybe a bit more water: the water of compassion. Embrace the other one – it could be physically or spread your warmth around the other person, telling them I am here for you.

More and more water… this time the water of mercy. Like a nurse, help others in their healing, by tirelessly offer them something special – maybe your role as mother, your capacity as an engineer or your ears as a friend.

But it is the last water that will make all your effort fruitful: the water of understanding. With understanding, forgive and open new doors of opportunity for people; with understanding, change the best you can and help others in their own change, and with understanding, help the world.

8 asana of the heart - being MERCIFUL

People create problems, right? That is normal and it is accepted, at least until a certain point. It is part of the game of relationships and a healthy relationship is capable of embracing that reality, forgiving and moving on.

But some problems cause deep wounds in the soul. Other people you know have hurt others; some have hurt you. And, yes, sometimes you have hurt others. What is the medicine for such a hurt?

To respond with the word love would look cheap for me a few years ago; that was when I decided to explore the subject of love and I was able to dismiss the type that offers an easy and simplistic answer. It is simply not realistic as love cannot heal anybody by itself, just like a hug can't heal a child who fell; it is just an emotional response, it just provides some psychological support and, of course, it is worthwhile. But it does not heal.

However, love can be expressed in various ways and there is a form that heals. MERCY.

Mercy is a type of love that comes from a particular relationship or even profession, so it does not fluctuate easily and it is much focused. How is mercy used to heal a relationship? The person will use their specialty to help the other one.

A mother will help her child by giving advice or by unburden him or her of some chores.

A doctor will treat their patient by giving medicine, but mostly by giving the best of their expertise.

A salesman will give a chance for another person to accomplish their dream.

A spiritual person maybe won't give something physical, but their words and their vibrations are very merciful.

 

How are you going to express mercy towards other people today?

 

This post is part of a series called 8 asana of the heart.

I recommend you to watch 8 postures of the heart.

 

Healing within

One thing I remember very well about my childhood: my bleeding knees… Yes, I used to run and fall a lot! After some time, it would create a dark skin over the wound, particularly after applying some type of painful medicine. Eventually, the skin would have gone, again more bleeding and at last I would look at my knee and see it completely healthy, ready for another run, another fall…

One day, my fall was bigger than the normal: I was practicing judo and I’ve broken my arm. My master, perhaps afraid of consequences, decided to deal with it and the results were horrible; I still have to make effort to touch my right shoulder with my right hand!

And there are wounds that seem to never leave you alone – I still wear glasses for reading, an outcome from bad reading habits.

But these are all physical and visible – or at least they can be felt. However, as humans, we accumulate many invisible internal wounds. Most will be healed in time, others will leave sequels and a few will lay unsolved.

Learning from the physical world may help us healing internally:

• We should be careful about not hurting ourselves due to the same circumstances over and over again. To practice introversion, to sustain an inner dialogue and to meditate will help us to prevent that.
• And if after talking with the self, we are still stumbling on the same stone, maybe we can go and look for someone who will help with that.
• Some wounds are too deep or too big to be ignored and they threaten to maim the soul. Patience and perseverance in healing by applying several techniques will help dealing with them.
• Let’s overuse kindness, compassion, mercy and forgiveness, particularly with the self.
• Some wounds seem to integrate themselves in our personality, changing the way we are not for the best. A therapy may help us to change ourselves back to a healthy being.
• Adopting a spiritual path will definitely help us to deal and to manage those wounds with which we will have to live.

Sincerity may help your relationship

There are probably two killers of any relationship, common to any people no matter where they live or to which culture they belong to: routine and sincerity.

Particularly it is interesting on how this high praised and needed virtue can be a relationship killer. Honesty is fundamental, but in its heavy metal version, where honest words taste like bullets and hearts are destroyed, sincerity turns to be lethal.

And yet… Well, by studying virtues, I have notice they cannot work by themselves and they need to pair in the right order. For instance, humility can make people turn losers in life, but with courage or self-esteem, it helps bosses to be effective, human oriented and very effective.

At times when lying is so common and socially accepted in many cultures I know, at least at some level, an honest person is extremely valuable. Sincerity is even more treasured, as the person will have the courage to say whatever is in his mind… with kindness.

Probably the most spiritual and kind man I know, he is able to make you realize your mistakes without really telling them. He is open and trusting, and yet he is clear about his thoughts and feelings and don’t act against them, which is the core of sincerity.

Without sincerity, a relationship will be like a cliff hanger: you are really not sure about what will happen next…

Kindness, gentleness and mercy help sincerity to become an asset to the soul, enabling the individual to break walls that prevent an open exchange and build bridges that strengthen the relationship.

Mercy, compassion and pity, and the art of serving

Our feelings for others matter. They have been the material with which we build bridges and are able to communicate with other people, creating this extremely powerful and yet fragile thing called society.

If we look into the past, we can't find terms like "customer service"... There was no customer service two centuries ago because there were no real customers. There were people, and the service was given to people.

Nowadays, when we see an organization that treats others as people, with respect and consideration, intelligence and gentleness, this is the result of a powerful feeling: mercy.

Yes, customer service is based on mercy. A company with mercy for a client whose luggage were damaged in a flight, who missed a flight because the company decided to depart early or simply a client with bad luck who lost their wallet somewhere, this organization is not simply fulfilling an offered product or making publicity; this company has mercy on people.

Because no matter how big we are, we serve people. Whether we sell fruits in a corner or we are part of a huge multinational, still we serve people. And mercy is a feeling of respect for others, for all their energy used to buy our products or to use whatever we offer them to use.

Mercy is not compassion. Compassion means going there and healing the person and that is not everyone's task. Those whose task needs compassion - doctors, nurses, mothers - cannot forget compassion is the basis of their lives and it can never be missing there.

But a few people would accept pity from others. No matter how bad is their shape, pity is not an option as it is depleted of respect.

Perhaps our brothers and sisters of the world are in a real bad shape and sometimes, we have to extend our hands and give something extra. Still, we don't need pity to do that. We can do out of compassion, a deep sense of compassion, going beyond mercy and with the clear knowledge that person is capable and soon will be walking by themselves. It is a feeling like a doctor or nurse has, who knows their patient one day will be out there, healed.

Next time you have to serve someone, open your heart and just let those feelings emerge, and watch for the outcome.

Words for a New Year

Some people are arguing, saying that time is passing faster, really faster. Whether it is true or not, reality is that 2011 was over and now we are entering 2012. And it did look fast.

2012 will be an interesting year. Many things are programmed everywhere in the world, but also crisis will tend to happen more often in various scenarios and dimensions of life. With that in mind, it is good to start 2012 with some words which can be powerful for your life. These are an extract of a small text I have sent as my Christmas gift to everyone - just to explain a bit of the background, it is a fictional idea of 2012 being the last year of my (ours) life(ves).

• If someone hurts your heart, talk to yourself and talk to God. God is the doctor of the soul, He will heal you and give you even more love.
• Never think negative of others, because the first person who experiences that negativity is yourself.
• If you want to take revenge on someone who causes you harm, the best way is to give him or her love, mercy, understanding and a new chance.
• If sorrow knocks at your door, don’t open it.
• Even though happiness does not knock at your door, open it and invite her to come in.
• There are no excuses to not do something: responsibility and action will help you to grow.
• If at some point a smile vanishes from your face, talk to God, with a friend or remember something pleasant. Don’t stay without a smile, not even for a second.
• If you think of something unpleasant that happened in your life, pretend it is just a movie and clap at the protagonist, which means, yourself.
• When pain comes, don’t stand it. With love and respect for your own body, surrender it to whoever can heal it. But don’t allow the pain reaches inside your being; to avoid that, talk to God and feel His healing love.
• Don’t deceive yourself about your situation, but do not exaggerate in relation to your destiny. Each day is more valuable, when you know you will be leaving someday – it is better to enjoy these days rather than think when they will be over.
• Don’t be afraid to say “I am leaving”. Understand better its meaning, talk to yourself and with others.
• Don’t be afraid of what is waiting for you. You will reap the seeds you’ve sown, so take advantage of your last days to sow even more seeds, not in the fear of what will come.
• Love. Don’t stop loving, never.