Victory or defeat

Victory or defeat is a relative perception. An example is given by Peter Drucker, the famous consultant and guru, about a leader who overstepped his faculties and tried to get advantage of a situation. It was clearly unethical and Drucker shows how the leader got his victory, only to turn into a horrible defeat a few years later and his leadership ceased to be considered magnificent.

In a very recent spiritual class, I was touched by a point that stated a short-term defeat can be a long-term victory.

Common people often don’t think in these terms - victory or defeat - but that’s our lives: “I have got this job”, “I lost that client”, “My friend stopped talking to me”, “My child got the best marks at college”, and so on.

Sometimes we win.

By working on our awareness, we are able to take the maximum of our victories in such a way that we can win again in the future. Besides, we may inspire others to win and, last thing, if for any reason our victory meant a defeat for another person, we can help the other one to feel OK, process what happened and be victorious next time.

Sometimes we lose.

We can always do alchemy and convert defeat into victory by:

• Learning a powerful lesson that empowers the self for the future.
• Imbibing a few useful qualities like humility, which otherwise wouldn’t come to our lives.
• Changing defeat into a step closer to victory, as there is always a valuable experience that comes with defeat.

Translating that into our lives:

• “I have got this job.” I will work in a very effective way, being aware that I am inspiring others too. If, for any reason, someone I know lost an opportunity like this, I will find a time to talk with the person and see how to help them.
• “I lost that client.” It is time for deep reflection, to understand what happened, maybe to talk with a friend, my boss or a coach about it. And move on! There are more clients out there.
• “My friend stopped talking to me.” I will make some time to try and talk to them, by using honesty and kindness. Meanwhile, I will send them best wishes and positive thoughts.
• “My child got the best marks at college.” I will celebrate along with them, but I will be clear my love for them is not conditioned to whatever happened in their lives; I love them as they are.

I wish you the best victory, a real victory.

A sweet defeat

Very few learn this when they are children: defeat and failure are normal.

Yes, we all want to be victorious and successful, but in reality, things are not in that way and there will be more situations of defeat than victory, for many people.

The fear of defeat and failure in our society is easy to explain, but in human terms, defeat and failure offer a very interesting opportunity to grow. In fact, success sometimes block growth – just check in the recent past companies like Pan Am and Blockbuster: their growth, their enormous growth, took them to a point that they became stable and slowly, they have descended.

Some companies were creative like IBM and AT&T and they could prevent most of the fall, but this seems the fate of successful companies. Maybe it is the successful people’s fate too.

Recently, in a nostalgic powerful moment, one of the greatest singers from the 80’s and 90’s performed one of her big hits, along another younger singer and the result was a piece of magic in a very dark world… A moment of hope, a motivation to take action and something beautiful.

Her life, some say, was almost destroyed by success… I am happy she was able to stop her own descent… but many couldn’t.

Failure is something else. Many years ago, still a high school student, I read about a book which name drew my attention. I asked the teacher who responded simply that the book was not successful…

Many years later, after a short stay living in Santiago, Chile, I saw a banner on the street announcing the launching of that same book! Come on!

It took me a few months or years, not sure, until I was able to be with one of the greatest contemporary Brazilian writers who told me that book journey: it was a total failure, then a different publisher bought its rights, it published again several years after the first publishing and it became probably the most read Brazilian book in History. It sold worldwide more than 60 million copies in almost 70 languages.

Don’t be mad at me for not revealing names (why do you have access to Google?), but my intension is that I would like you to think about yourself…

Maybe, you had a huge failure sometime ago, but life has turned around and that failure turned into success.

Or you were not able to sustain your professional success and things are not as they used to be. Even though you are not having as much success as before, your mind is light, your relationships are much better, you feel so well! It is success, in a different way.

Perhaps you compare yourself with others and you notice how much they have gained, and you, so little… Take into account all you have, even your brilliant mind and the potential that was not revealed yet. And embrace the successful person you are.

Of course, there will be failures that won’t become a success… What lesson have you learned? Which changes should you implement in your life after that defeat? How that failure can turn into motivation for you or others?

I tell you, defeat and failure, they are very sweet…  It is just a question of perception.

New Year 4 – Implementation…

So, you have New Year's goals or resolutions, some objectives or a long-term vision...

Besides, you recognize that you have to develop a few qualities to fulfill all this and...

EMPOWER YOURSELF! The fundamental thing for this to take place.

And now just ... DO IT!

When it comes to implementing, the best plans end up being changed or simply do not work, so here you have some tips for their implementation; for this purpose, I will be calling New Year's goals, objectives or resolutions as a plan:

• Keep the plan in writing to guide you.
• Do it step by step, date by date. You can use tools such as a scheduler or send you an email scheduled for a specific day.
• Do it slowly and fast... That is, meditate, reflect or contemplate before each step, but do not stop.
• Before making any changes to your plan, reflect deeply, something you can do even as you talk to someone who can actually cooperate with you.
• Celebrate every victory, it doesn’t matter its size.
• Transform every defeat into a lesson and an opportunity for improvement.

Victory or defeat

Victory or defeat is a relative perception. An example is given by Peter Drucker, the famous consultant and guru, about a leader who overstepped his faculties and tried to get advantage of a situation. It was clearly unethical and Drucker shows how the leader got his victory, only to turn into a horrible defeat a few years later and his leadership ceased to be considered magnificent.

In a very recent spiritual class, I was touched by a point that stated a short-term defeat can be a long-term victory.

Common people often don’t think in these terms - victory or defeat - but that’s our lives: “I have got this job”, “I lost that client”, “My friend stopped talking to me”, “My child got the best marks at college”, and so on.

Sometimes we win.

By working on our awareness, we are able to take the maximum of our victories in such a way that we can win again in the future. Besides, we may inspire others to win and, last thing, if for any reason our victory meant a defeat for another person, we can help the other one to feel OK, process what happened and be victorious next time.

Sometimes we lose.

• We can always do alchemy and convert defeat into victory by:
• Learning a powerful lesson that empowers the self for the future.
• Imbibing a few useful qualities like humility, which otherwise wouldn’t come to our lives.
• Changing defeat into a step closer to victory, as there is always a valuable experience that comes with defeat.

Translating that into our lives:

• “I have got this job.” I will work in a very effective way, being aware that I am inspiring others too. If, for any reason, someone I know lost an opportunity like this, I will find a time to talk with the person and see how to help them.
• “I lost that client.” It is time for deep reflection, to understand what happened, maybe to talk with a friend, my boss or a coach about it. And move on! There are more clients out there.
• “My friend stopped talking to me.” I will make some time to try and talk to them, by using honesty and kindness. Meanwhile, I will send them best wishes and positive thoughts.
• “My child got the best marks at college.” I will celebrate along with them, but I will be clear my love for them is not conditioned to whatever happened in their lives; I love them as they are.

I wish you the best victory, a real victory.