The Attitude of Assertiveness

Many years ago, the word ASSERTIVENESS began circulating. It was something new, a different attitude that emphasized self-esteem, within the communicational context, avoiding negative confrontation.

It's probably the most important communication skill out there, but it's still not talked about much, and maybe not as practiced as it should be. Some of its benefits are very clear:

• Increased self-esteem, on both sides of the conversation. The assertive side needs self-esteem for this skill to work well and, if there is no self-esteem on the other side, it is too "low" or too "high", it won’t work either.
• Better results in a negotiation, generating satisfaction. The assertive side will feel that their requests and demands have been heard and the other side will understand them better, being able to make a decision.
• A greater understanding of others’ needs. Although assertiveness serves to express what a person really thinks or needs, it can help in developing the ability to understand as we all have points in common and an assertive person acknowledges that unites them as a bridge.

Assertiveness, as an attitude, works as a template in which thoughts will come from self-esteem and will serve as a reaffirmation to the person. It is part of a self-leadership attitude, part of the process of an individual reclaiming their power to lead themselves.

I would like to focus on this self-leadership and, in relation to this, assertiveness has two basic functions:

• Facing without confronting. Look at situations head-on, facing them. However, know that you don't need to fight people or situations; confrontation is the last instance of a conflict that, in general, can be solved through several ways and assertiveness is a tool of empowerment.
• Defending without contesting. Defend your ideas, without renouncing principles or vocation and specifically, without fighting with others. It enters into the same function as before, but especially in the stage of conversation or negotiation in which the other party makes their demands; it is key to be protector of what is valuable, without the competition that often happens.

But how does it work?

Without assertiveness, it would be quite complex to make changes in the daily routine, without upsetting a partner or neighbors, or to start a meditator path and expect people in your office to understand your new lifestyle...

Assertiveness will guarantee that you handle talking to your partner, clearly describing your new daily routine, negotiating without giving up what is important to you and obtaining successful results. The same will happen in your work and in all areas you touch in life.

Experience assertiveness and live in an inspired way.