Embracing a tough reality

How is reality for you? In fact, you have – and me too – two realities.

The first one is the REAL ONE, made by atoms and molecules, bodies, things and nature. The second one takes place in our mind and it is as real as the other one, but just for us; it is possible another person will perceive the same reality in a different way.

Let’s think of an exercise. Check an object that you know very well. Now, close your eyes and pick it up – memories will come related to the object. Some of those will be just images or sensations to the touch, but a few will be the moment you received it, who gave it to you, how do you feel when it is near and others that have nothing to do with the physical reality of that object.

In fact, by using this same concept in relation to the situations you see, you hear and you feel, there is something great about it: you may not change the reality as it is, but you can change the perception…

Back to the object: maybe it has been a symbol of love from another person. However, one day, your best friend needs it and you give it away; now, it becomes a symbol of YOUR love towards others. That is one of the most powerful keys to change perception, donation.

So, if your perception of reality is negative, donate something to others, in relation to that. A few examples:

Job situation is BAD! I can’t get work! So, I decide to volunteer and give others the best of myself.

Divorce is knocking at my door… I decide to talk with the person, but I will keep in my mind their special version, the reasons for which we got together.

I am suffering with bullies… I know it is going to pass; now, what I need is to talk with the people who love me, so that I am surrounded by that love and the bullying effect decreases.

So, don’t bother too much with the circumstances; work on your perception and they will change, at least for you.

To let go and to let in

There are circumstances we shouldn’t be dealing as they hurt us, they remind us of the worse of other people and we are unable to enjoy them. They are not part of a self-progress path; on the contrary they may destroy our sense of purpose.

And so, we just let go of them, we let them to flow to past waters and we move on, back to our self-progress road.

However, from time to time, a situation would emerge in which a lesson can be learnt. It is even possible that situation would make us realize something and change. From time to time, whatever we should have let go… we should not. On the contrary, we should open our heart and let ourselves in…

Maybe by using wisdom or talking to other people, we are able to discern which is which and at times of so much uncertainty, that discernment is even more important, because if we don’t let it go, we may regret about it later, and if we don’t let ourselves in, we will miss a valuable lesson.

In my experience, there is a question that I ask myself: How necessary is for me to go through this? If I understand this is not necessary, I make effort to step away of this circumstance; if I appreciate its importance, I brace myself and I prepare for the storm that is about to come.

Use your wisdom and don’t leave your path of self-progress.

A dysfunctional life

Life is basically a question of balance. When there is balance, life goes well.

When balance is lacking, life goes badly…

OK, it is not that simple, but balance is a key factor to experience a life of plenitude.  And the reality supports balance is not that common.

Every day, we hear stories about people who hurt themselves or others. Every day, we hear about people who lost their aim in life. Every day, we hear about people who makes other people lose their goals.

There is no easy solution for reaching that level of balance, particularly if the person is way out of balance. but there are a few things to do to restore its balance:

• Breath before acting, or at least reflect upon whatever you are going to do.
• Talk with other people, hopefully wiser than you.
• When you really feel disbalanced, don’t lose your heart, keep on moving, keep on trying.
• If all fails, take a break by travelling or going for a retreat.
• New habits are hard to form, but they are the best solution to keep balance.
• Be happy! Enjoy happy news, the company of happy people and act with that happiness.

An unplugged life

Disconnect yourself.

Not now, you are reading this! Plan a time for that and live an unplugged life even for a few hours. Or minutes, if you are too busy.

The benefits are enormous, it is called tech detox and it can give you another perspective for life.

Before disconnecting yourself and therefore, stopping to read this, a few points to take into account:

1. Some of the things to which you are connected are under your responsibility. Before unplugging yourself, start a backup plan for them.
2. Tell other people who should know you won’t be available for a while, but don’t brag about it. In fact, just tell them you are not going to be available; if you start to explain yourself, they may argue and you will be involved in trying to justify what you are doing. And of course, you will need to be connected for that…
3. Have something to do during that time: cleaning, sorting your clothes, donating your clothes, reading a wonderful (paper) book, talking with that special person (in person), enjoying life.
4. After you come back from this detox, understand what happened to you, check about what you got for doing that. Tell others and inspire people to disconnect themselves too.

Enjoy it! I am sure it will improve your health, if you do that a few times during the week.