Victory over THOSE THINGS you cannot defeat

 

There are things you cannot defeat…

There are those projects at work you will never be able to finalize.

There are people you won’t forgive. Never!

There are memories that cannot fade away and they will keep haunting you forever.

However…

By just trying to finalize a project at work, you will be developing new skills, a new attitude and a new perspective on your profession. Maybe the project is not as important as those things you are acquiring.

Many years ago, a yoga teacher was sharing about a person she could not forgive. It was a surprise for me and for the people who were with her, and yet it was like taking a course of “how to forgive the unforgivable”. Maybe you cannot forgive someone, but I know you are a good person and I am sure you are not wishing bad things to those people. So, instead of trying to forgive or think of forgiving, just visualize that person happy and peaceful… I am sure that pure energy will reach them.

And instead of being haunted by old memories, why don’t you create new ones? Go for a walk at a beautiful place, invite someone to have lunch with you or simply read a book that inspires you; new beautiful and powerful memories will serve as candles that will illuminate the castle of memories and will prevent the ghost of bad memories to ever come back.

There are things you cannot defeat, but you cannot be defeated either.

In fact, victory can be as simple as reframing what you want to get, wishing the best to others and lighting a lamp in your mind.

Victory or defeat

Victory or defeat is a relative perception. An example is given by Peter Drucker, the famous consultant and guru, about a leader who overstepped his faculties and tried to get advantage of a situation. It was clearly unethical and Drucker shows how the leader got his victory, only to turn into a horrible defeat a few years later and his leadership ceased to be considered magnificent.

In a very recent spiritual class, I was touched by a point that stated a short-term defeat can be a long-term victory.

Common people often don’t think in these terms - victory or defeat - but that’s our lives: “I have got this job”, “I lost that client”, “My friend stopped talking to me”, “My child got the best marks at college”, and so on.

Sometimes we win.

By working on our awareness, we are able to take the maximum of our victories in such a way that we can win again in the future. Besides, we may inspire others to win and, last thing, if for any reason our victory meant a defeat for another person, we can help the other one to feel OK, process what happened and be victorious next time.

Sometimes we lose.

We can always do alchemy and convert defeat into victory by:

• Learning a powerful lesson that empowers the self for the future.
• Imbibing a few useful qualities like humility, which otherwise wouldn’t come to our lives.
• Changing defeat into a step closer to victory, as there is always a valuable experience that comes with defeat.

Translating that into our lives:

• “I have got this job.” I will work in a very effective way, being aware that I am inspiring others too. If, for any reason, someone I know lost an opportunity like this, I will find a time to talk with the person and see how to help them.
• “I lost that client.” It is time for deep reflection, to understand what happened, maybe to talk with a friend, my boss or a coach about it. And move on! There are more clients out there.
• “My friend stopped talking to me.” I will make some time to try and talk to them, by using honesty and kindness. Meanwhile, I will send them best wishes and positive thoughts.
• “My child got the best marks at college.” I will celebrate along with them, but I will be clear my love for them is not conditioned to whatever happened in their lives; I love them as they are.

I wish you the best victory, a real victory.

Be a conqueror

A few years ago, I watched a powerful video in which a singer, survival of a plane crash with visible scars, sang a song that never came out of my mind.

It was about being a conqueror, because that was what she thought she was. That is what she was.

Many times, you have to overcome something, avoid another situation or just winning over what is taking place. At other times, you must be a conqueror, a victorious soul, because there is a battle outside there…

Being a conqueror does not mean to fight or struggle, but to shift awareness and look at reality with a different outlook.

It means to act in a conscious way, knowing the reasons and meaning of our acts, being aware of our errors and change the needed behaviors.

If you are at a war right now in your life, don’t give up. Work on your awareness and be the conqueror you really are.

A sweet defeat

Very few learn this when they are children: defeat and failure are normal.

Yes, we all want to be victorious and successful, but in reality, things are not in that way and there will be more situations of defeat than victory, for many people.

The fear of defeat and failure in our society is easy to explain, but in human terms, defeat and failure offer a very interesting opportunity to grow. In fact, success sometimes block growth – just check in the recent past companies like Pan Am and Blockbuster: their growth, their enormous growth, took them to a point that they became stable and slowly, they have descended.

Some companies were creative like IBM and AT&T and they could prevent most of the fall, but this seems the fate of successful companies. Maybe it is the successful people’s fate too.

Recently, in a nostalgic powerful moment, one of the greatest singers from the 80’s and 90’s performed one of her big hits, along another younger singer and the result was a piece of magic in a very dark world… A moment of hope, a motivation to take action and something beautiful.

Her life, some say, was almost destroyed by success… I am happy she was able to stop her own descent… but many couldn’t.

Failure is something else. Many years ago, still a high school student, I read about a book which name drew my attention. I asked the teacher who responded simply that the book was not successful…

Many years later, after a short stay living in Santiago, Chile, I saw a banner on the street announcing the launching of that same book! Come on!

It took me a few months or years, not sure, until I was able to be with one of the greatest contemporary Brazilian writers who told me that book journey: it was a total failure, then a different publisher bought its rights, it published again several years after the first publishing and it became probably the most read Brazilian book in History. It sold worldwide more than 60 million copies in almost 70 languages.

Don’t be mad at me for not revealing names (why do you have access to Google?), but my intension is that I would like you to think about yourself…

Maybe, you had a huge failure sometime ago, but life has turned around and that failure turned into success.

Or you were not able to sustain your professional success and things are not as they used to be. Even though you are not having as much success as before, your mind is light, your relationships are much better, you feel so well! It is success, in a different way.

Perhaps you compare yourself with others and you notice how much they have gained, and you, so little… Take into account all you have, even your brilliant mind and the potential that was not revealed yet. And embrace the successful person you are.

Of course, there will be failures that won’t become a success… What lesson have you learned? Which changes should you implement in your life after that defeat? How that failure can turn into motivation for you or others?

I tell you, defeat and failure, they are very sweet…  It is just a question of perception.

The biggest victory starts from the smallest step

Some people think of a victory as something grand, an epic movie on the making, with sounding trumpets and all. Reality is – and you probably already know – most moments of victory are quite ordinary.

They can come when we do a great sale, a wonderful project we proposed is approved, our child gets an award or a very good friend recovers from illness. It is a feeling that nothing can stop us and reality bends to our wishes.

There is no formula for victory, and yet it is not a question of luck. It comes from effort and thinking, victory is born from determination and dedication, and it relies on concentration and patience.

However, there is something in common with all types of victories: the first step is usually a small one. The great sale started with a call or a response from an inquiry; the project came from a conversation with a few friends; the award is fruit of good parenting, talking to the child and motivating them, and the friend’s recovery started with a google search…

Think about your most recent victory and the more you think about it, you realize there is a small step that would take you to that moment of victory.

So, what about taking care of those steps? Yes, most of the time we are not aware which step is going to take us towards that victory, but we can be more aware and move with more focus, helping victory to come up.

Nothing is permanent, all is eternal

Think of nothing as being permanent…

And your sorrow will fly away…

And your problems will vanish with the sunset…

And your obstacles will look so small…

 

Think of everything as being eternal…

And you will be aware that your victory is eternal…

And you will learn that all you do inspires others…

And you will realize your obstacles are there as lessons to be learnt…

 

By doing that, instead of sorrow, happiness will come in.

And instead of getting worried by problems or obstacles, you will celebrate your victory or learn the lesson.

And most important, you will be a hero, a heroine that will inspire many others to realize that nothing is permanent.

All is eternal.

New Year 4 – Implementation…

So, you have New Year's goals or resolutions, some objectives or a long-term vision...

Besides, you recognize that you have to develop a few qualities to fulfill all this and...

EMPOWER YOURSELF! The fundamental thing for this to take place.

And now just ... DO IT!

When it comes to implementing, the best plans end up being changed or simply do not work, so here you have some tips for their implementation; for this purpose, I will be calling New Year's goals, objectives or resolutions as a plan:

• Keep the plan in writing to guide you.
• Do it step by step, date by date. You can use tools such as a scheduler or send you an email scheduled for a specific day.
• Do it slowly and fast... That is, meditate, reflect or contemplate before each step, but do not stop.
• Before making any changes to your plan, reflect deeply, something you can do even as you talk to someone who can actually cooperate with you.
• Celebrate every victory, it doesn’t matter its size.
• Transform every defeat into a lesson and an opportunity for improvement.

Victory over THOSE THINGS you cannot defeat

There are things you cannot defeat…

There are those projects at work you will never be able to finalize.

There are people you won’t forgive. Never!

There are memories that cannot fade away and they will keep haunting you forever.

However…

By just trying to finalize a project at work, you will be developing new skills, a new attitude and a new perspective on your profession. Maybe the project is not as important as those things you are acquiring.

Many years ago, a yoga teacher was sharing about a person she could not forgive. It was a surprise for me and for the people who were with her, and yet it was like taking a course of “how to forgive the unforgivable”. Maybe you cannot forgive someone, but I know you are a good person and I am sure you are not wishing bad things to those people. So, instead of trying to forgive or think of forgiving, just visualize that person happy and peaceful… I am sure that pure energy will reach them.

And instead of being haunted by old memories, why don’t you create new ones? Go for a walk at a beautiful place, invite someone to have lunch with you or simply read a book that inspires you; new beautiful and powerful memories will serve as candles that will illuminate the castle of memories and will prevent the ghost of bad memories to ever come back.

There are things you cannot defeat, but you cannot be defeated either.

In fact, victory can be as simple as reframing what you want to get, wishing the best to others and lighting a lamp in your mind.

HAPPY DIWALI!

Victory or defeat

Victory or defeat is a relative perception. An example is given by Peter Drucker, the famous consultant and guru, about a leader who overstepped his faculties and tried to get advantage of a situation. It was clearly unethical and Drucker shows how the leader got his victory, only to turn into a horrible defeat a few years later and his leadership ceased to be considered magnificent.

In a very recent spiritual class, I was touched by a point that stated a short-term defeat can be a long-term victory.

Common people often don’t think in these terms - victory or defeat - but that’s our lives: “I have got this job”, “I lost that client”, “My friend stopped talking to me”, “My child got the best marks at college”, and so on.

Sometimes we win.

By working on our awareness, we are able to take the maximum of our victories in such a way that we can win again in the future. Besides, we may inspire others to win and, last thing, if for any reason our victory meant a defeat for another person, we can help the other one to feel OK, process what happened and be victorious next time.

Sometimes we lose.

• We can always do alchemy and convert defeat into victory by:
• Learning a powerful lesson that empowers the self for the future.
• Imbibing a few useful qualities like humility, which otherwise wouldn’t come to our lives.
• Changing defeat into a step closer to victory, as there is always a valuable experience that comes with defeat.

Translating that into our lives:

• “I have got this job.” I will work in a very effective way, being aware that I am inspiring others too. If, for any reason, someone I know lost an opportunity like this, I will find a time to talk with the person and see how to help them.
• “I lost that client.” It is time for deep reflection, to understand what happened, maybe to talk with a friend, my boss or a coach about it. And move on! There are more clients out there.
• “My friend stopped talking to me.” I will make some time to try and talk to them, by using honesty and kindness. Meanwhile, I will send them best wishes and positive thoughts.
• “My child got the best marks at college.” I will celebrate along with them, but I will be clear my love for them is not conditioned to whatever happened in their lives; I love them as they are.

I wish you the best victory, a real victory.

Zeroes and ones

There are three things we can learn from the use of zeroes and ones in the mathematic of life.

• If 1 means a victory and 0, a defeat, then the exact position is to give your victories the front position. Don’t forget them ever, not as a gesture of arrogance or “bragging about it”, but as a reminder of your strength.
• By giving a victory the front position, you will always remember it. Besides, if for any reason, your defeats come to your mind – they occupy the front position – well, zeroes to the right of one don’t affect it much… Your defeats won’t be included in the general result of your life, they have passed and your victory will outshine them.
• And if you put zeroes behind the 1 – they occupy the back position – that means your victory was so great that your defeats, the zeroes of your life, make it even greater. For instance is someone wins a medal at some sports, that is something to celebrate, a wonderful victory, no doubt; if this person has some incapacity, had a rough childhood or his self-esteem is low, the victory will be even greater. In life, each defeat increases the value of each victory.

King or pawn?

If your life was a big game of chess, which position would you take?

I think at least in the level of perception, we all have thought of ourselves as kings of our own game… or pawns, at times.

When you are a king, you have power and so many people protect you, they are ready to leave the game if that is the case.

When you are a pawn, on the other hand, you are basically fodder for the cannon. You are made to die!

However, let’s think deeply… after all, the king can also be defeated and if this game is between me and, well, me, then who is the winner and who is the loser? On the other hand, the pawns are amazing in the game as they are the first ones to start and they are very courageous.

In reality, if you feel you are in a human chess game, even when you are the pawn – things are going wrong, you feel you are not supported, etc. – you can still let your courage and heart guide you.

You are a champion

Did you know you are a champion?

 

You have won innumerable battles and conflicts…

You have conquered hearts and brains, hugs and positions…

You have won over your own mind, defeating many useless and wasteful thoughts…

You have won over your own limitations, beliefs that have been limiting your power…

You have won over your emotions and you moved on, even when situations tried to prevent you...

 

Do you remember when you were over the edge, ready to fall over an abyss? You won!

Do you remember when nobody believed you? You won!

Do you remember when you couldn’t believe in yourself? You won!

Did you know you are a champion?

 

Keep on winning, the world needs, more than ever, champions like you!

Even a small victory is a big conquest - Reason 62

For an ordinary person it is all about victory or defeat.  In relation to victory, the bigger the conquest, the bigger would be the joy.  But leaders see triumph in a different way.

Leaders are always facing obstacles; it could be considered as part of the job, if being a leader was a job.  In this way, conquests and victories keep on happening, but also defeats and losses.

A victory may be as subtle as being quiet instead of responding badly to another person, or it may be as obvious as changing an old habit, transforming the business or taking a country towards a new direction.

It does not matter the size of the victory or its impact, leaders will feel pure joy as if they won a prize or a lottery.  It warms the heart and enlightens hope in the soul, and keep leaders moving toward the next challenge.

(Excerpt from the book 82 Reasons to be a Leader)

 

Hummm

One of the big struggles people face nowadays is their own past. Yes, forget about Libya and the American economical crisis, your past disturbs you more than anything happen in the world today, small or big.

Yes. It is not easy to accept that, but the past visits me sometimes, to remind me of dark times and huge walls I cannot cross. Past teaches me to give up and to surrender to the world around. Or, it tells me to fight until I am weary, until I am on the floor. Perhaps the past teaches me to just complain and everything will look better - hey, blame someone else and you will see how your own burden gets light. A "wiser" past tells me to go into the theory of my own life, it will give me the wonderful feeling I know it all.

But... only but... I start to pay attention to this teacher. I start to read between lines, to catch its wisdom rather than its information or knowledge. And I really start to learn from my past. I learn light is better than shadows and I have it in myself, others also have it and I just have to switch it on - yes! the reason of the darkness I lived was not the absence of light, it was the fact I did not know how to switch it on.

I learn about the doors and windows in these huge walls that allow me to cross them so easily, and that I must go on - giving up and surrendering is simply not an option, it was a test by my teacher, the past, to see if I was alert. Sorry, no fight at the school, and instead of complaints, it is better to do something better. In a school, there are no blames, we are all learners, and my burden is my backpack, which is really nothing.

The wisest past is teaching me to understand life so that I can live it better.

Thank you, my sweet past, to bring me to this wonderful present.

Take care all of you!

You can be a student of the past, or a victim of the past.

Anthony Strano