The ability to keep an open mind, as part of your personal ethics

Many years ago, I saw a book at a friend's desk. Unwisely, I've made my comment (negative) about its author, to which my friend replied: "The thing I don't like you is that you don't have an open mind!"

On one hand, that helped me checking my own attitude and it made me realize I lacked that particular talent. But it is quite a difficult skill, I must tell you! At that time, I just responded to my friend: "Well, if you have an open mind, of course you don't mind my comment..."

What is to have an open mind? Does that mean to deprive yourself of opinions and concepts, and rather say YES to whoever comes to you?

I confess this is a skill I am still working out. I used to have very strict opinions, believing things were either black or white. I was communist for some time, trying to counterbalance my lack of political education. After reading George Orwell's Animal Farm and some personal research, I got quite disillusioned with that ideology, and to be sincere, with any ideology. Around that time, I got into an Air Force school at my country, a typical right-wing environment and that helped me to go into a more balanced view in relation to politics.

So, part of my own learning on this skill has been to behave like a pendulum... going from one side to the other. However, it is quite long in terms of learning and not always pleasant.

At present, how I see that skill in myself? Bearing in mind I am still working on that, let me share some points that can help:

• It is important to see the benefit of having an open mind, which is to be able to relate to very different people, with very different opinions and ideas.
• I always keep in my mind an old saying, based on Niels Bohr own ideas: the opposite of a small truth is falsehood; the opposite of a great truth is another great truth.
• Even though I don't agree with a person, I must agree with the fact he or she thinks like that, and respect it.
• If another person's ideas interfere in my life, then I remind myself of my own value; if my ideas are the right ones, so I stick to that as much as possible.
• I don't get into conflict, but I don't accept ideas just like that; for someone else that can be fine, not for me...
• If someone has a total opposite opinion and we have to share actions together, it is good to talk to the person before anything, and keep in mind the differences.
• If someone has a total opposite opinion and dialogue does not work, don't work with that person, but keep the friendship as much as possible.
• Differences can turn into an advantage, if you know how to channel them.
• No matter what happens, you cannot stop loving someone.

If you have any other tips and tricks, share with us all!