Empathy and society

As we evolve as humans, we become more and more aware of what is happening with our relationship with others and the need of a new society.

Our way however is not straight as we would expect. As I write, the big trend is to live alone, to work alone and probably to share society as we understand using Internet. I do hope that is not the case of whoever is reading this, but it is the case of so many.

And I can relate to it, as I would probably prefer to not have much interaction with others, but life is wise and I am kind of in the spotlight most of the time. I started to appreciate others’ company not that many years ago, learning to deal with so many differences, all because I do believe in the power of a community with empowered individuals.

This is why I feel at some point, these lonely people will find their way into the new society we are building – more tolerant, more interested in people than in things, greener and better. It may take time, but I have that certainty it will happen.

So, if you want to be part of this new society, you need to learn a very important skill that is not so natural after all.

Although many people describe empathy as feeling what others feel, I disagree. I don’t think I can feel what a mother feels when she loses her son, or someone who just finds out he or she has cancer. But I do care, and out of care I look into the depth of that person, of that soul.

Sometime ago, a friend lost her child and it was in a bad timing of our relationship, since she did something I could not approve. Still, I just put that bad sensation I had aside and I gave her unconditional support, from the heart.

Empathy makes the best of us emerge. It makes us to be unconditional and understand the other in dimensions we wouldn’t imagine there are. It binds us together as a big family, with respect for each other’s thoughts and perceptions.

Former societies were not formed on the base of empathy – from which solidarity comes. History shows they came from mutual interests, ethnic similitude and other very physical and visible traces.

One of the few cases I know of a society based on empathy is related to the flight of Zoroastrians from Persia. According to the legend, King Jadi from Gujarat, India, in the initial meeting between with the newly landed emigrants denied asylum to them. The King motioned to a vessel of milk filled to the very brim to signify that his kingdom was already full and could not accept refugees. In response, one of the Zoroastrian priests added a pinch of sugar to the milk, and Jadi Rana accepted the refugees.

This is an example of empathy from both sides, by the use of wisdom: the King trying to explain why he could not receive more immigrants, and the priest, showing that they would just melt into the Indian society. Whether it is a legend or not, centuries later, the Parsis (as they are known), have adapted to India. Their importance in terms of neutrality has created many stories hen religion conflict affects India, where families of Parsis risk themselves to save other people.

As a suggestion, just look at another person. Right now, if you can, otherwise, just think of her or him. Understand their need and see what you can do, from the heart, even though you cannot do that right now. Feel the sensation of mercy and the desire to help others, and extend your mental hand…

One day, we won’t need empathy, as it will be natural to care, but right now it is an important skill to be developed. Our society is the basis of humankind and it needs our help to reinvent itself.