When it is better not to change…

 

There are several reasons to change and I think you are a person who likes, or at least WANTS to change, right?

But there are a few reasons to NOT change, even though situations are pushing you to do that.

The first thing is when you are trying to adapt to another person’s way of life. Of course, if you are a partner or a room-mate, then both will have to adapt, but many times, it is a one-way expectation, and that is not right. Create a dialogue with the other person and check how both of you can adapt to each other or alternatives.

The second reason is when the changes that are expected from you won’t benefit you. There are cases when they will benefit others; check how to do it in such a way you don’t feel a loss. But, in general, if something is not beneficial to you, don’t do it. Talk with others and see how you can accommodate, without losing that which is precious in you.

Third, when the changes that are expected from you won’t benefit others, similar to the second reason. There are cases when they will benefit you; check how to do it in such a way others don’t feel a loss. But, in general, if something is not beneficial to others, avoid doing it. Talk with others and see how both sides can accommodate, without losing that which is precious for them.

Now, if you are not fully convinced of any change, reflect upon it. Maybe it is the method you don’t like or the possible outcome; by reflecting and realizing, it is possible you can change or you can reach the conclusion you won’t follow that particular change.

A last advice: you are your own leader. Don’t react, don’t change because situations change and don’t try to make others change. Reflect, meditate and understand before promoting a change in yourself.

When everything falls apart… but hope is still there

 

There’s a moment, quiet or loud, when life feels like it’s crumbling and you feel you are on the verge of a personal catastrophe.

Maybe it is the loss of something precious or the weight of everything finally getting too heavy.

You think about giving up. Not in a dramatic way, just... fading out of the fight.

But then, something inside you whispers:

What if?

What if there’s still another chance?

What if this crisis is just the end of one chapter, not the whole book?

That whisper is HOPE and although its sound is not loud, it is real.

It is often the only thing you need to take the next step, even if it is small.

Moving on when things are really bad doesn’t mean pretending everything’s fine. It means accepting the pain, the loss, the fear and keep walking anyway.

Maybe just one tiny choice at a time, like eating in a different way, breathing deeply, meditating once or twice, or calling a good friend. Perhaps it is just a deep and meaningful sleep...

This is the time to write something down, to reflect, to contemplate, because the new opportunity might not show up in a flash. It may come tiptoeing in when you are not looking.

But it does come. And when it does, you will know that you didn’t give up and you stayed long enough to see what that new possibility.

And that’s where life begins again. Good luck!

How to Filter Out All the Noise

 

Noise can be harmful and new research suggests the damage it causes is even worse than we previously thought.

Technology has offered one solution: noise-cancelling headphones are booming. But despite the innovation, there's still an overwhelming amount of sound: street noise, buzzing cell phones, loud conversations. Noise pollution, especially in urban environments, is on the rise. Colombia recently approved a law to regulate it, but honestly… it’s not working yet.

But not all noise is physical.

There are two other types of noise that can affect our health just as much - and perhaps more deeply - than the sounds outside our windows.

The first kind is internal: the noise of our own worries and the anxiety that has quietly gripped modern society. It hums constantly in the background, making it difficult to think clearly or reflect. And reflection is essential as it is what allows us to understand what is happening in our lives, make good decisions and move forward.

The second kind of noise comes from outside, but not through our ears. It comes from other people and their constant interference in our thoughts. Maybe you think you're immune. Maybe you believe you’re completely independent. But ask yourself: Why do you use that particular brand of soap? Why did you change your job? What shaped your political views?

This noise comes from the not-so-silent world of social media, which feeds us other people’s opinions, judgments and beliefs. It doesn’t just speak; IT SHOUTS! And often, it drowns out our own voice.

For these two kinds of noise, there’s no technological noise-cancelling solution… yet.

Except… there is something we can do.

From experience, I’d recommend three simple practices that can help you filter out the noise and listen to yourself more clearly:

• Meditation and a shift in lifestyle. A regular meditation practice and a healthier, slower lifestyle help reduce the mental buzz of anxiety. Even something as simple as a walk in the park can bring surprising silence.
• Self-esteem. When you build a deeper awareness of your own value, it becomes easier to overcome the pressure of outside opinions. Reflection exercises and inner work can reconnect you with your core, your own voice.
• Boundaries for your attention. Be intentional about what (and who) you allow into your mental space. Curate your social media, your conversations and your environment like you would do with your home.

Filtering the noise isn’t about escaping the world; rather than that, it is about creating enough quiet to listen to what truly matters, that which comes often from deep reflection or from the heart.

A map to understand cause & effect

 

In terms of solving problems and personal change, there is a special element that was forgotten, at least by me: cause & effect.

If there is a sickness, by understanding its symptoms (effect) as connected to a cause, it is easier to heal; if anyone only focus on the symptoms, trying to fix that, it is possible the cause remain intact and later on, symptoms will come back. It is a principle that medicine follows, and so other areas of our human complex society: if I am hurt by someone (effect), by finding the cause (something I said) I may fix it; if you are not going well in terms of business (effect), by finding the cause (bad marketing skills), it is possible to solve the problem, and many other examples.

However, in life things are not so simple. One thing is the ONE CAUSE – ONE EFFECT, but what about if there are many CAUSES and one effect? Or worse, when causes and effects are not easy to track…

So, here is a small map of a sort and I hope it helps you to deal with different situations in which you can identify causes and effects.

• One cause, one effect. It is the easiest one, but the trap lies in trying to fix the effect and leaving the cause alone. Go for the cause, the effect will fade away.
• One cause, several effects. If you see situations come to your life and you can track them to one common cause, again go for the cause, but because there are many effects, work on them too; it will make life easier.
• Several causes, one effect. Yes, it is possible that one single effect has different sources, which means it will take time to solve it. Solution would be the same as before, but my personal suggestion is… forget the causes! Just focus on the effects and, at your own pace, deal with a few causes that come on your way.
• Several causes, several effects… or not! This is the highest level of complexity and causes & effects model won’t work on this case. Focus on your objectives in life, check about your specialties and make a plan to move forward.

Hope this map works for you!