Saturday, October 27, 2012

True Friendship


In a world where people has about 2,000 friends via Facebook, I just wonder if the same word FRIEND is changing its meaning.

In an old and beautiful Brazilian song, Milton Nascimento states: Amigo é coisa para se guardar debaixo de sete chaves dentro do coração... (Friend is something to be kept under seven keys inside the heart). And that has been always my image of a friend, someone who is always there.

First, a friend is someone you have a deep connection, which is opposed to a superficial connection like business or "likes and dislikes", or Facebook. This deep connection sometimes is based on something you shared together like an adventure or school; other times, is just because you both are people interested in the same things and you dive deep into them. So, start checking now: who are your friends?

Second, a friend is that person who is available, no matter what. Not the romantic and idealist availability that is almost impossible in such a times when everyone works and works and works. Availability is an attitude: if you are available to another person, you will have that one in your mind and as soon as you physically available, you will call him or her. You can't forget, because you are a friend. Check: Whom are you friend to?

Third, a friend will be by your side, always, even though you make a mistake. Even though you make something that goes against your friend's values and principles. To be by your side does not mean to agree with you. A friend will know when to push, when to be firm and convince the other person to regret, apologise or make any correction to those mistakes. The most important thing is that a friend won't cut you off, never.

How many true friends do you have? Keep them, they are treasure.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Peace Progress


As a resident of this wonderful country, full of potentials, Colombia, I follow the news on the peace process very closely. It is the third time we have such a process, at least in a very serious and committed way: first was during Pastrana's government, second was during Uribe's government and now during Santos' government.

The three of them were totally different in form and essence, but still I feel the connection between them. Out of the three, the most visionary was Pastrana's and I do hope some of those initiatives emerge again. It failed though, probably for bad management and perhaps because there is a thin line between vision and idealism, and sometimes idealists forget we live in a very real world. Still, behind the failure there was success merged. For me, peace in a country is a process of construction, not a snap of magic.

The second process is very controversial, as it was done with paramilitary  They emerged as a kind of civilian response to the guerilla  but they got life on their own. And violence. Many people don't see the success here, I guess it is just me, but I have good memory and I remember that there was not one week, and for a long time, when I did not hear news about the atrocities done by paramilitary groups. Now, there are much more than one year I don't hear it. But more than the success, lesson here is the reality of a peace process. Even though it dismantle the structure, it can't change much of the people, so some of these people are still involved in violent activities, and some groups have emerged, but they are very far from the paramilitary style, they are just acting violently.

The former processes can be very valuable for this one now. On one hand, provide the areas dominated by the guerilla with solid chances for economic growth - I remember there were news even Iran was contacted during Pastrana's government, which would start some business in one of those areas. On the other hand, be more realistic, knowing some of these people will still continue in their violence due to any reason, and create mechanisms to prevent that, or at least minimize it.

I am not related to politics, as a foreigner much less, so another point which is important is to take care of three very basic elements for those who were related to the guerilla  First is health - years, for some decades, of life in jungle can affect your health. Not only physically, mental health is something that has to be considered too to avoid situations of war veterans coming back from war. Ah, let's not forget the peace process has to be extended to the military.

Second, education is a powerful tool. It gives people hope and understanding, and enable them to go beyond their limitations. It also helps to prevent people to go back to violence. I feel education can be considered a long term element, focusing in giving basic education for people who were directly involved in the guerilla  but also making sure somehow a high education for their children.

Last, but no least, spirituality and values. In fact, for me this is the most important as it helps people to go back to their own roots of peace and love, the wonderful feeling of being part of this human family. In Sri Lanka, where the end of their war was a very violent one, guerilla members received raja yoga course as a way to cope with their new civilian life. Many of them are back to the society, and spirituality helps them to have a different approach towards problems.

In reality, all humans are now at war, at least in their minds and spirit. Desires, lack of satisfaction, animosity, hate and many other negative qualities have created a room in everyone's heart. The ultimate peace process is in that sacred place, helping each one to overcome their own violence and reach an original state of peace.